When you feel an emotion, there is a gap between when you experience the emotion and when you respond to what you’ve experienced. For some, the gap is smaller than others and that’s where you could see how someone may be labelled ‘quick to anger’.
And how is our response determined? By our past experiences, especially if they were painful events. When an event happens, our reptilian brain labels it as safe/unsafe, good/bad, or pain/pleasure. Thi is to protect you. If another event happens that reminds your brain of a previous painful event, it will right away react in the same fashion as before...even if the circumstances are not the same!
This means that if for example, you had a negative association with a parent growing up, when you meet someone that reminds you of your parent, you will react with the same behaviours, feelings, etc as with your parent.
This is why first impressions are important, once you’ve put someone into a category, good/bad, is late/early, etc. you tend to leave them in that category, especially if you’ve known them for a while. Now, imagine that they’ve changed and are no longer that label...how do you change the way that you’ve labelled them?
The challenge is that your conclusions on an event or person are based on your tools that you used to interpret your situation.
The solution is to change the way that you see a past event. For example, if you had a tough childhood and had to overcome many obstacles, you may now view it is life preparing you to be the amazing person that you are. Life was just building your resilience skills as opposed to life trying to beat you down.
If you change your story about a situation or a person, you change the way you see them. Change the way you see someone and you change yourself and your past.
Need help changing the way you see something? 613-761-1600
In order to become great at something, you will experience failure...and it will happen often. Greatness doesn’t happen in one day, it happens over time. For example, to become a great pianist, it takes years and years of dedication to a craft.
There is no guarantee to greatness either. We’ve all heard of child prodigies in certain areas and they grow up not to be in the same areas later on in life.
You can’t win and become great by staying within your comfort zone either….if this were the case, you’d already be where you want to be. Calculated risks need to be acted upon at the right time.
You can’t be great without taking some sort of action. And once you are aware of the actions steps that take you towards your goal, you get to do them over and over and over again until you get there.
Mistakes are part of the process and can be seen as a stepping stone to your goals. Make the mistakes, fail often and correct along the way.
Being great sounds like a lot of hard work...and it is...so why would be want to do it? Because it allows you to reach your full potential. This makes you feel good, which makes it worth it.
Need help figuring out the best version of yourself? Give us a call 613-761-1600
Deep down, there are some truths that you know about yourself. Some people are able to accept their truth and then change their lives to live in alignment with their truth. Others either ignore it or run from it. This option can cause long term pain and suffering.
Why are so many people afraid to speak or act on their truth? Because acknowledging it, would mean that you would have to change your life in some way and change is hard.
Imagine when you were young, your doctor told you that you had a slow metabolism. If you gained too much weight, you would just say, it’s because of my metabolism. If you developed a health condition, everything could come back to what your doctor said. Now, what if you realized that your truth was that you could create the metabolism of your choice? What would be different then? Might you have to change your diet? Perhaps exercise? Accepting a truth would mean changing your life and that is hard.
Now what if your truth was wanting to know your purpose in life? What would you have to accept about yourself? Perhaps that you are more powerful than you thought? Perhaps that you are worthy or that you have certain gifts and talents?
Ask yourself, why don’t you want to know the answers to the questions that you are asking? Or even better, why do you only want to know the answers on your terms? What is the alternative you ask? Allowing the answers to flow into you and accept them for what they are.
Are your scared of what others might think of you if lived your truth? Your role in life is not to get others to understand you, it is to release the need to seek others approval.
Go out there and be brave and courageous. Seek your truth and align yourself with it. The world needs you, more than you know.
There is a cost to every choice that we make. This is because our time is a finite resource. We only get the next minute once and once that minute is gone, we never get the same minute back again.
This means that whatever you are choosing to do with your minute, is coming at the cost of the other choices you have at that exact moment.
What’s important to know is when you make a choice, what other opportunities are you giving up in that moment (minute, hour, month, year, etc)?
If I choose to watch tv instead of working on my business, then there is a cost to my choice. That’s not to say that I shouldn’t watch tv, only to say that there is a real time and investment cost to that choice.
Now, what if I got caught up on Facebook or watching cat videos on youtube for hours? What would my choices cost then?
Remember that everything is a choice. If I went to my favourite buffet place to eat (Mandarin or All You Can Eat Sushi), the cost of eating one item would be that I couldn't eat another item because there is a limited capacity in my stomach on what I can eat.
Bottom line is: be aware of what each choice is costing you at the moment and then you can decide where you want to invest your most valuable resource which is your time.
Want to invest more in your health? Give us a call 613-761-1600
If someone asked you, what’s one thing you could do that would improve your health? What would you answer? Perhaps you could eat better, exercise more, decrease your stress, etc. All these things you know already, but why aren’t you doing them?
There is a common misconception, that knowledge is power. However, knowledge is not power unless you take action on the knowledge. Even being aware of something is not power, it’s a starting point, but again, it does not help unless you plan to take action on the awareness.
For example, I am aware that Japan is a country. But just because I’m aware of it, it doesn’t mean I have plans to visit it anytime soon.
So, instead of asking yourself, what knowledge or awareness you are lacking, instead try, what action steps can I already take with what I know to become more congruent….and then go out there and take action!!!
Gaining knowledge, information or awareness is actually the easy part. The hard part is acting on what you know.
Do you want to live a live that others generally don’t? Do you want to achieve what few have? Then you need to take the action steps that few do.
What action steps can you take right now to bring your life more in line with what you know?
Not sure how to proceed? Give us a call 613-761-1600
Life often gives us the lessons that we most need to learn.
One of the most challenging things about having young children is a lack of sleep. For the first few months, infants are up every few hours to nurse/ feed. After that, some babies start to sleep longer and others do not.
Some figure it out after a few months and for others, it could takes years. Each child is unique, just like each adult. New parents are often asked, does your baby sleep through the night yet? If your child does not and you’re tired, overworked and grumpy, this is not a question you’d like to hear. You also don’t want to hear about children who have been sleeping through the night from the beginning….unicorn babies.
My child was not a good sleeper...from the beginning. I had ‘my way’ of wanting to do things and I was adamant about it….so much so that it was hard to admit that what I was doing was not working. I.e. I was not getting much sleep. My partner had a different way of wanting to do things and it was not until we were pregnant with our second child that I conceded and we tried his way.
I was stubborn and still am but in life, sometimes you have to pivot and do things the opposite of what you have been doing all along. There were tantrums from both myself and my child at the beginning but in a couple short weeks, our little guy had finally consistently slept through the night.
How often do we fight for the way we do things when what we actually need to do is pivot and explore other alternatives?
Give us a call if you are currently trying something that isn’t working and would like to pivot. 613-761-1600
In Turning Setbacks into Comebacks- Part 1, I told my story about how I turned what was supposed to be a major business setback into a comeback. I also talked about what I learned from the experiences. In Part 2 of this article, I’m going to go through the precise steps and questions that I asked myself to make my come back.
Firstly, when we experience what we consider to be a setback, whether in business, health, relationships, finances, etc. we want to examine our expectations of the situation.
Where our expectations realistic? I often have people coming into the office with health challenges and having unrealistic expectations of how long it will take to heal. If you come into the office with poor posture, it did not get there overnight. Poor posture is built over years and years of abusing your body and neglect. It will not take a couple of visits for your to straighten up.
Look at the last time you had a setback in an aspect of your life. Did you have realistic expectations of the situation. Hint: probably not. If not, what was the reality of the situation?
Next, we want to examine the setback further. Here are some questions to ask yourself:
Whether you decide to call it quits or make a comeback, the experience will have taught lots of life lessons. Appreciate what you learned and take this new version of you into your next adventure.
Need some help with this? 613-761-1600
Before practicing here at the Hampton Wellness Centre, I was at another location. I had put in a lot of energy and effort to build a practice there and what seemed like overnight, it was gone. I was crushed. How could something that I worked so long and hard for, be gone in a flash?
At the time, I felt lost, embarrassed and I didn’t know what to do. I admittedly sulked at home for a bit and wanted to hide under a pillow for a while. Luckily, I have great support from family, friends, colleagues and mentors who encouraged me and helped me to pick myself back up.
Within 1 month, I was back up and running and I have not looked back since. What seemed like a setback at a time was really an opportunity. Yes, I had to rebuild my practice. Yes, it was still a challenge. However, there were lots of learning experiences that I took from it that will serve me in the long run.
Some of those are:
Want to find out the skills I used? Stayed tuned next week for the second part of Turning Setbacks into Comebacks.
Come to one of our workshops 613-761-1600
A few weeks back, I wrote a blog about getting rid of things and the meaning we have attached to what we are trying to get rid of.
This past weekend, I was inspired to clean out old baby clothes. What I learned was that I had more emotional attachment to my baby’s clothes than I had expected.
As I started to go through the boxes, I would see the outfits and memories would come back from when he was wearing those clothes. From his first outfit coming home to his first swim to what he wore the day he turned 1. As I started to go through the boxes, it got harder and harder to give things away!
I even thought about the article that I wrote about how hard it was to give things away! So, I had to come up with a plan that worked for me because the clothes had to go.
For the clothes that were easy to purge, I donated them to a neighbourhood family. For those that were more difficult, I gave them to a good friend. For me, having them go to a child that I can see make new memories, allows me to let go of them more easily.
How do you give away things that you have attachments to? Share your tips in the comments below.
Curious about what we do here? Give us a call 613-761-7600
Some people create goals or resolutions and then forget about them. How can they come true if they aren’t in your consciousness?
Remember that success and failure are both choices. In fact, they are made up of many choices along our way. We don’t become overweight because of one bad food choice. We become overweight by many poor choices, repeated over again.
You need to choose to take action on your goals. Over and over again until you achieve your desired results.
Here are some ways to keep your goals at the top of your mind
The more you put your goals in the forefront of your mind, the easier it will be to manifest them. What are some things you do?
Dr. Amanda is a non-traditional chiropractor who focuses on Neuro-Optimization in Ottawa, Canada.