What happens when you do something wrong and someone confronts you about it? Do you apologize right away? Do you get angry and try to defend yourself and/or your actions? Do you shift the blame to someone else who’s around?
I will be the first to say that I am not always great with apologies. After a disagreement or discussion, I usually need to take my time to think about the situation before I can come back and give a heartfelt apology.
Since I was a child, I had a difficult time admitting that I was wrong. Part of it is due to the Asian culture that you need to always save face in front of others and another part is the perfectionist programming in me. I wrongly programmed into me the belief that if I made mistakes and others knew my flaws, I would not be good enough and that I would not be loved.
This erroneous programming has caused problems in relationships, connections with others and myself and had the opposite effect to feeling loved.
After the awareness of this belief, I have worked hard to be aware of this programming and am taking steps to improve upon it.
So, how do you react when you are wrong? If it’s blame, shame, avoidance or running away. This is a growing opportunity for you.
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Dr. Amanda is a non-traditional chiropractor who focuses on Neuro-Optimization in Ottawa, Canada.