We all want to feel that we are important, appreciated and that we matter in some way to this world. While we may want to feel appreciated, what allows us to actually feel it?
Because we all have different life experiences, hurts, cultures and circumstances, our nervous systems are uniquely wired to fit us. What may cause one of us pain may cause another one of us joy.
If we want to feel appreciated, how important would it be to know how we feel appreciation? Or receive appreciation? Super important! Because others might be trying to let us know that they appreciate us but we aren’t receiving the message.
My husband and I have different communication styles for love and appreciation. For him, his nervous system prefers that you tell him in words. I appreciate you, I love you, you matter to me and you are important.
For myself, my nervous system is more attuned to behaviours and actions. I.e. my husband brings dinner home after a long day or work so we don’t have to cook, he let me sleep in by looking after the baby, etc.
Knowing how each of our nervous systems is programmed is helpful because while I may do lots of actions to show my husband that I care, he may not interpret it that way without my also telling him.
Check in with yourself. What do you need to feel loved? Actions, thoughts, behaviours, words? Observe how you communicate to others in different relationships.
Write below what you observed!
Dr. Amanda is a non-traditional chiropractor who focuses on Neuro-Optimization in Ottawa, Canada.